On Foot:
In
Bangkok, short
distances are ok, but watch your step. If you wander along gawping in shop
windows, you'll end up falling down a very big hole. The pavements are often cracked and uneven, and
there's no guarantee that you're safe from motorcyclists looking for short cuts.
The Thais also like to turn their pavements into obstacle courses, and
typically, they'll litter the path with food stalls, tables, chairs,
motorbikes, pot plants and bins. While you're watching out for these trip
hazards, you'll knock yourself out on an overhanging shopfront. It'll also be hot and humid and
the traffic fumes can be overwhelming.
Never assume that vehicles will stop for red lights, because red lights don't
apply if cars are filtering. Don't jump to conclusions about the
direction of traffic just because you're walking down a one-way street. In Thailand,
the right of way is determined by the size of the vehicle you're driving. Lorries and buses come first, then cars and motorcycles, then bicycles, and then
you. As a pedestrian, you're fair game, and worth 100 points. Pedestrian
crossings exist in Thailand - but only in the strict sense that sometimes you see
striped lines on the road. All motorists ignore these. Keep your wits
about you, and watch how the locals do it. If you deliberately set out to walk
somewhere that's more than about 200m away, most Thais will assume you're completely
mad.
Motorcycle taxis: Scary in
Bangkok, but ok for short trips in quieter towns. The motorcycle taxi drivers hang around in
gangs on street corners, and all wear coloured and numbered waistcoats, showing
where they are registered with the police. Agree the destination and price with
the driver before you go anywhere. The price is usually 10B for a short trip
around town during the day, maybe 20B at night. You probably won't be offered a crash helmet.
Tell the driver
to go slowly: "Bai cha-cha, kap/ka".
Public buses: Noisy, crowded, smelly, and I'm never quite sure that
I've caught one going the way I want to go. They're cheap, of course, unless you're heading the
wrong way. Use the Bangkok bus map when you're in the capital, and who knows what exciting places you'll
discover without meaning to? Outside Bangkok, these noisy, smelly buses race
between towns quickly and cheaply. The seats are hard and narrow, and the
leg-room is designed for Thais, not falangs.
Tuk-tuks:
In Bangkok and Chiang Mai, these are three-wheeled open-sided suicide vehicles, can carry two fat
westerners in the back, or three skinnier ones. They are marginally less scary than
motorcycle taxis, and nippier than taxis. They're fine for short rides, if you're sure the driver understands
where you want to go, and you've agreed the total fare before you set off.
The
drivers are unlikely to speak much English, but will know the whereabouts of
most of the usual tourist sights. Male passengers in Bangkok without female companions can expect the driver to offer
to take them somewhere for - um - a good time. Most conversations with Bangkok tuk-tuk
drivers tend to follow the well-worn path: "You
like lady? You want massage?" It's
not compulsory to like ladies or to want a massage, so if neither are
applicable, say so: Mai kap.
In other towns, you
usually get a four-wheeled variety of tuk-tuk
with a little more space in the back for bags
and extra passengers, and the drivers are often less interested in your sexual preferences and future plans.
Song-taos:
A song-tao
is basically a covered
pick-up truck with two benches in the back - the word song-tao
means "two benches". Outside Bangkok, they roam the
streets or ply particular routes picking up or setting down passengers as
requested. You should flag one down by beckoning with your palm facing downwards.
Tell the driver where you want to go and if he nods, jump in the back. You can
halt the song-tao
anywhere along the route by pressing the little door-bell set on the underside
of the roof, or by rapping sharply on a metal handrail with a coin. Pay the
driver when you get off. Outside the tourist ghettos, a 10B fare is pretty
standard in the daytime, 20B at night. School kids get these to school and back, and you'll find yourself
sharing with old women, baskets of fruit and vegetables, and the occasional
chicken.
Metered taxis ("Taxi-meter"):
In
Bangkok, these are mostly yellow-and-green, or
red-and-blue. You can flag them down all over town. Air-conditioned, metered,
and my second favourite way of getting around the capital. Just after Christmas 1999, I
spent an hour in one during rush hour and travelled about 10 miles, for a
metered fare of 100B. If the meter isn't switched on, or the driver doesn't like
the sound of your destination, agree a fixed price before you set off, or find a
taxi with the meter switched on. I've never seen a taxi-meter outside Bangkok.
Unmetered taxis:
I avoid
these in Bangkok, mostly because of the abundance of metered ones. If you find you have to use one in the capital, the same rules apply as for tuk-tuks: make sure
the driver knows exactly where you're going, and agree the fare before you set
off. Don't accept the driver's offer to take you to his friend's shop to look at
some "precious stones" (i.e., lumps of coloured glass) or anything similar.
Outside Bangkok, unmetered taxis
(sometimes called "share-taxis") are fine for longer in-town and
between-town journeys. They'll mostly be battered old limos which you hire by
agreeing the price and destination in advance.
River Express Boats:
This is my favourite way around Bangkok, but
it's only good for chugging between
the designated pier-stops on the river. It's a bit scary getting on and off
because the boats don't tie up at the piers. You have
to wait until a landing space is clear, and then leap across the gap between the
boat and the pier. But once you've got over the trauma of embarking, it's a great way to see some city sights and get some wind in
your face away from traffic fumes. It's also very cheap - just pennies.
Long-Tail Boats:
You'll
see these all over Thailand on rivers and on the coast, and they're great fun.
They're long thin wooden boats which have a car engine mounted on a pivot at the
back. The propeller is at the end of a long drive shaft, and the driver just dips it in the water when he wants to go, and pulls or pushes the
whole engine and drive shaft about the pivot when he wants to change direction.
You can see some photos of long-tails on the Ao Nang,
Kanchanaburi and Songkhla
pages.
Bangkok Skytrain:
This is newish, and it's very civilized. It's basically an air-conditioned
light rail system on a
set of concrete flyovers. The stations are well organised and the staff
are very helpful.
Leaving Bangkok
By Air: If you're
pressed for time, and don't mind missing out on the scenery which you'd see from
slower means of transport, Thai Airways, Bangkok Airways, and others fly cheaply
and regularly to loads of destinations in Thailand. Chiang Mai in the north is
only an hour away from Bangkok, as are the larger towns in the north-east, and
Hat Yai, Phuket, and Ko Samui in the south. Fares vary, but a couple of
internal flights are unlikely to break and they save a lot of time.
For example, if you wanted to travel from the deep south to the far north
(Hat Yai to Chiang Mai, for example), you'd spend less than 3 hours in the
air. The train journey, however, would take you a day and two nights
- leave Hat Yai 6pm on a Monday, arrive in Bangkok Tuesday morning, depart
Tuesday evening, arrive in Chiang Mai Wednesday morning.
